Tom Robbins
Bisexual cowgirls, mutant hitchhikers, the corpse of Jesus Christ, peyote eating mistresses, attic bound princesses in love with terrorists, belly dancers. What wouldn't a 13 year old girl love? I ended up reading and rereading Even Cowgirls Get The Blues until I broke the binding. My 9th grade writing class was thrilled with my description of the prairie sex scene. The teacher? Not so much.
Tomas Wolfe
I found The Electric Kool Aid Acid Test on my dad's book shelf in 7th grade. I loved the descriptions of the Merry Pranksters and, of course, the sex. I probably could have kept this one under the radar if I hadn't taken it school with me. Apparently, middle school councilors become concerned when a 12 year old is talking about LSD and freakouts.
Hunter S Thompson
After the Wolfe book, there really wasn't any harm in reading Hell's Angels, right? Wrong. Well, reading it was just fine. Explaining it to the grandparents of my middle school BFF was not. They actually forbid her to hang out with me after that.
John Waters
If Crybaby and Hairspray were ok to watch while babysitting, then why not Pink Flamingos? I, again, might have gotten away with this if I hadn't attempted to discuss the dog shit eating scene with my dad. I also became fairly obsessed with drag queens at this point. It was crushing when I realized that I could never be one.
Dorothy Parker
Cute little couplets are one thing, but a ninth grade English class may not be the best place for Resume. At least, that's what my teacher told my dad when she called.
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